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October 24, 2015:

Why Our Kids Are Out of Control

Focusing on good behavior decreases the instance of misbehavior.

By Jacob Azerrad, Paul Chance, published on September 1, 2001 - last reviewed on June 14, 2012

Whiny, arrogant, rude, violent. America's children are showing their bad side. Child psychologist Jacob Azerrad, Ph.D., and Paul Chance, Ph.D., show us what we can do to save our children.

Michael is out of control. He has several temper tantrums a day, throws food during meals, deliberately breaks toys and household items, hits and bites his younger brother and sister and refuses to comply with reasonable requests. Asked to put away his toys or go to bed, the 5-year-old replies, "No. And you can't make me." He is, in truth, a very unpleasant child. He is also very unhappy: No one can behave as he does and feel good about himself or be pleased with life.

We seem to be in the midst of an epidemic of Michaels. I have been a child psychologist for 35 years, and each year I see parents dealing with more and more severe problems. Their children are not just ill-mannered; they are whiny, selfish, arrogant, rude, defiant and violent. Most of them are also miserable, as are their parents.

Such disgraceful behavior in young children predicts serious problems later in life. As adolescents they are more likely to drop out of school, use drugs , engage in delinquency and be clinically depressed. And when I read newspaper articles about road rage , commuter rage and office rage it seems to me that many out-of-control children are growing up to be out-of-control adults.

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https://www.psychologytoday.com/articles/200109/why-our-kids-are-out-control